You know it’s not the same

as it was. This is one of our favorite songs right now. My girls love hearing Harry Styles’ goddaughter’s voice at the beginning. They, of course, respond to anything that includes little humans to whom they can relate. When it comes up on Pandora we repeat it at least three times.

OK, one last time (in unison) for the cheap seats in the back!

We shout and we laugh and we sing and we drive. Then they start to fight and I turn the music up louder. Begin to tune out.

“In this world, it’s just us. You know it’s not the same as it was…”

It’s just us. Three teeny-tiny words with a fucking gargantuan impact. For me, anyway. So big, so big. Because who is “us”? And then my thoughts begin to wander… Us is me and whoever happens to be top of mind at the moment when the song comes on – that’s determined by what’s going on for me daily. Hourly, even. And the different versions of “us” drum up very different emotions – regardless of the lyrics and the songwriter’s intent – it’s my mental second and our entwined energies that make the song about love or heartbreak or potential or success – anything, really. That’s the beauty of good writing – the words can mean whatever someone wants them to mean in the moment. So versatile. So personal.

It’s just us. These three words got me thinking about the Japanese legend of the red thread: The idea that there’s a red thread tied from one person’s pinky finger to another’s. These two people are destined to come together in an important story regardless of time or circumstance. There are many versions of this folklore, but I love the one best that suggests this is simply for two people who are going to influence each other’s lives – not necessarily for lovers or soulmates. And I also love the idea that we don’t get just one thread, but many, and they come into the world with us when we’re born. And everybody has them. And as we cross paths back and forth and over and over, we weave a beautiful tapestry that is the Universe. Energetically. Soulistically. We are all connected.

And then I got to wondering – what if we’re not given the threads? What if we chose them? That makes more sense, doesn’t it? It’s certainly more empowering – the idea that we chose certain people to connect with in life, versus being given them as if they’re some kind of gift that can be taken away at a moment’s notice on someone else’s whim. That instead, they’re our gifts to ourselves. I love this idea so fucking much. It’s like when I buy myself a new pair of shoes or a hot pair of panties or a luxurious perfume – I give these things to me because I love the fuck out of me. What if we chose each other because we love the fuck out of ourselves?